Alf makes his full return to The Heat Beat Podcast and unveils the criteria that makes a superstar a superstar with his Signature Shoe Theory. The guys detour to belt and Big Bang Theory talk before breaking down the highlights of the Miami Heat’s first preseason game.
First show of the 2017-18 NBA season and we are back in full swing! Heat Twitter President Alf fills us in on what’s been on his mind lately. The guys talk Dwyane Wade signing with Cleveland, roster construction, and trading Erik Spoelstra for Klay Thompson? Small Sample Size Theater makes its triumphant return and convinces us all how Miami has adopted the Spurs system.
Giancarlo Navas, Brian Goins, Leif, Brassjazz, Alex Toledo and Christian Hernandez spend the entire show debating Kyrie Irving’s value, what it would take for Miami to acquire him and why Cleveland is turning into full dumpster fire mode. Gianni also reveals a hidden love for Tyler Johnson that you can’t miss. Oh… and Brian’s Time to Shine makes a return, sort of.
Gianni tones his outraged persona down for this episode. Hooray! Brass, Leif, Alex Toledo and Brian Goins join to discuss everything from puppet media questions, the Heat Beat perception of being homers, and who the most likely Heat member to search on the deep web is? We also debut “That’s So Riley?” where we take your hard-hitting journalism questions that the media wouldn’t dare ask The Godfather.
Kelly Olynyk gets signed by the Miami HEAT minutes before the show. What happens next is unhinged Giancarlo Navas blasting his bile and poison at tradable contracts. Harrison Cytryn, Clay Ferraro of WPLG, Crab, and Brian Goins try to calm him to no success.
HEAT fans have been left questioning this roster’s ceiling and the direction of the franchise in general. Miami’s road back to contention is as unclear as ever and as a fan it can be difficult deciding how to approach this uncertainty. So what are your options as a fan?
Despite some lapses, Bam Adebayo showcased who he is (screen-setter, glass-cleaner), who he could be (face-up threat, shot-blocker) and how far he has to go (strength, positioning) in his NBA Summer League debut.
Draft day is among us!!! We watch the draft live and react to everything as it happened. Gianni has no idea about who any of these people are. Nekias and Alex try to provide analysis. We also watch Monk drop and are on “Monk Watch” for much of the show. Also, who the hell is Adebayo?
The Finals are over! The guys break down the NBA Finals as everyone slanders a different person. We talk how delusional HEAT fans think they’re getting everyone, and how McBobs is gonna save the HEAT? Gianni also tells his drunken story at a Chicago wedding. The guys react.
The Clusterbleep crew rejoins with special guest Chris Joseph of the Miami New Times. Harrison scorches the Earth with his hot takes on LeBron James, HGH, Michael Jordan and more. Brass Jazz is unhinged. And Christian Hernandez has the best Kevin “Capri Sun” Love stats.
It is the duty of a journalist to search for the truth by any means necessary. I am not a journalist so I didn’t feel the need to exert a particularly large amount of effort in my search for the truth, but I did a few quick Google searches and what I found was shocking.
Tuesday night’s NBA Draft Lottery outcome was anything but a worst case scenario. In a league prone to tanking and where rest takes precedence over winning, what the HEAT accomplished this year is worthy of praise and admiration. Fans need to stop looking at a franchise’s assets not only in terms of draft picks and expiring contracts but in the value of standing and reputation.
Gianni, Brian, Nekias, Harrison and Alf discuss the 2017 NBA Draft Lottery and marvel at Alonzo Mourning’s facial expressions. We talk conference final playoff matchups, how dumb people are for suggesting that players should leave the East because of LeBron, and Brian reads scouting reports on prospects the HEAT may target poorly.
Tyler Matthew Johnson was never supposed to become the Toothless Terror that he is today. To understand how this undrafted 24-year old turned into this monstrosity, let’s start our diagnosis by examining his development beginning with his college years.
Gianni, Jack, Nekias and Brian fight through two hours of audio troubleshooting to bring you an hour of content that somehow talks about the Miami HEAT during a time when there are no games or news. How do we overcome it? Great question, you ask. Well, on this episode we debut a new segment where we give relationship advice using coined Spo-isms dubbed, “Exes and Spos,” a parody of Elle King’s pop hit “Exes and Oh’s.”
If you like bad, inconsistent internet connections, the sizzling sound of burgers being seared and Gianni’s frenzied yelling sprinkled with some basketball talk, this is the pod for you. God bless your heart.
We welcomed Israel Gutierrez of ESPN & Barry Jackson of The Miami Herald to discuss two of the greatest Miami HEAT stories published on the same day: (1) Pay Riley’s Manifesto from ESPN: The Magazine as written by Wright Thompson and (2) Dion Waiters’ Masterpiece written by Dion “Google Me” Waiters himself for the Player’s Tribune. We also break down HEAT free agency with Barry, who dropped some saucy nuggets.
Gianni, Leif, Alf, Brass Jazz and Brian get together for the first offseason podcast of the Miami HEAT season by discussing exit interview comments from James Johnson and Dion Waiters, Carmelo Anthony rumors, and an anime bet that didn’t go as planned.
We welcomed Rohan Nadkarni of Sports Illustrated as our special guest to discuss why Udonis Haslem is a liar—at least to Gianni. We obsess about HEAT Culture and how players are making it seem like it’s a cult. We revisit our takes from the beginning of the season. And Rohan tells us Heat Twitter is too savage for him.
Anthony Chiang—the puppet!—returns from his 6-8 week ban for his fourth appearance on The Heat Beat Podcast to discuss last night’s HEAT win over the Charlotte Hornets (all the threes) with Gianni, Harrison, Leif and Brian. We bring back the most strident and cocksure Hot Take Harry ever. We play the game that’s sweeping the nation, “HEAT lifer or not a HEAT lifer?” And we debate whether or not Dion Waiters is worth a payday and why the Milwaukee Bucks are a bunch of losers.